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Shinobi (2002) (PS2)


Bringing it back to them old school days I am, well just about.

The original Shinobi was released in 1987 way before I was born but hey fuck it I still had a chance to play it so fuck y’all, it was a success so, naturally, a barrage of sequels and remakes came into our lives. I’m talking about the 2002 version on the Playstation 2 so let’s get cracking.

Bad ass? Yes, yes he is.

You play as Hotsuma what he has to do with Shinobi I honestly have no idea but I digress. I’m not going to lie and say that I watched the in-game cut-scenes because I didn’t as the voice acting is absolutely terrible so fuck that. From what I did pick up however is Hotsuma and his brother have a fight to the death to see who is the better choice to run their clan and obviously Hotsuma wins and gets a sword called Akuji which drains the souls of people it slays. Yeah. An earth quake hits and shit starts to go down where flying fish and pissed off tonka toys start floating at you and you have to kill them.

A wild palm tree appears!

The game is pretty bog standard as far as I’m concerned, hack and slash, kill, drain souls and repeat. Shinobi isn’t terrible by all means but the one major gripe I’ve got is the fucking camera. The camera seems like its being controlled by Michael J Fox and Muhammad Ali in an arm wrestling match whilst using an Ab master. Yeah it is that bad. It will affect the way you play as you could be darting around the level, slicing fools and running on walls like it’s nobodies business when, all of a sudden, Muhammad Ali does the twist and the camera decides to do a back-flip and you end up falling arse over tit in a ditch and when you die that’s it you go all the way back to the beginning of the level no questions asked kiss my arse sir.

One of the harder levels with the poxy camera. Right at the beginning of the game!

The game isn’t exactly hard although there will be times when you can feel yourself getting stressed, I mean really stressed, the type of stress where you want to grab the creator of the game and repeatedly shove tripe down his throat, maybe not that far but you get the drift. The hardest part by a country mile is the final boss who is a Boy George look alike. I swear to god it took me at least 15 tries with this prick, prancing around like he’s just been rogered by Elton John.

Shinobi is like a poor man’s Ninja Gaiden. The camera is god awful and it will hinder your progress more often than not. Play it if you must that’s all I can say.

Stay beautiful.

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